Don’t trust the technology

We recently signed up to a new gym.  Fancy place, fully digitised and tech heavy.  I have been asked repeatedly whether I wear a pacemaker.  I think that has less to do with my health and more to do with buggering up their electronics.  I suspect if I had one, I’d be encouraged to focus more on the analogue equipment.

One bit of kit that caught my eye was the Boditrax, a glorified set of scales that carries the by-line “beyond body composition”.  I’m not sure what that means; beyond composition suggests decomposition to me and, although I’m not as fit as I’d like to be, I haven’t yet started to rot.

By standing on a platform and gripping its handles, Boditrax magically provides more information than a simple weight measurement.  It provides 14 different metrics including fat and muscle mass, skeletal and abdominal analysis, a physique classification and a metabolic age.

I’m tickled by the physique classification for the highest fat percentage and lowest muscle score.  Boditrax has opted for the politically correct “Hidden Obese”.  I’m not sure where people in that category will be hiding their fat, but it does conjure an image of veins popping from prolonged tummy tensing.  My measure provides me with an “Obesity Warning”, which presumably means that I need to do some exercise or start looking for hiding places.

I did think I was doing a little better than that reading implies, but there is clearly work to be done.  None more so than when it comes to addressing my metabolic age.  Mrs GOM stood on the machine before I did and, coming in at 16 years younger than her actual age, the machine confirmed what we all know, that she is brimming with youth.  By contrast, I am not.  I turn 50 next year, but according to Boditrax, four summers have passed since that mark was achieved, proving categorically, despite Mrs GOM’s assertions to the contrary, that you can’t trust technology.

Maybe the clever people at Boditrax should develop their system to incorporate a maturity index.  On that measure, I’d be sure to come in considerably below my years.

Twitter: @GOMinTraining
Copyright © Craig Brown, 2019
18 October 2019